You’re getting old when…

you-re-getting-old-when Info

You Know You’re Getting old when..

I thought we could have some fun here, especially since as we deal with kids on a daily basis, and that is what keeps us young…

For those of us who have been turning the wheel a bit, I hope you enjoy this trip down memory lane…

Here we go!

“All skaters, change directions” means something to you.

“Members Only” jackets…say no more.

A predominant color in your childhood photos is “plaid”.

And lastly, I’ll make a song stick in your head for the rest

Chevy Chase was really funny in those vacation movies.

If female: you thought that Shawn Cassidy was “dreamy”, lusted after “Ted, your ship’s photographer” on the Love Boat or Chachi.

If male: your first love was Marsha Brady, Jeannine, Samantha from Bewitched, Josie or any one of the Pussycats.

In your sophomore class picture, you’re wearing a shirt with the collar “up”.

It was a major accomplishment to get to the “Chase” scene in Ms. Pacman.

The Brady Bunch Movie brings back warm memories.

You can remember the words to the theme song of “The Greatest American Hero.” (“BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I’M WALKIN’ ON AIR… I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD FEEL SO FREE-EE-EE…”)

There was nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living together.

This rings a bell: “and my name, is Charlie. They work for me.”

You can recite the Preamble to the Constitution, but only to the tune of Schoolhouse Rock.

You ever asked to be gagged with a spoon.

You ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut or used Short and Sassy shampoo.

You ever owned a Donnie and Marie or Sonny and Cher poster.

You ever owned a set of “Pop-Wheels”, that handy little combination of shoe and roller skate that lasted about a year on the open market.

You ever wanted to learn to play “Stairway to Heaven” on the guitar and choreographed “Dancing Queen” by yourself in your room.

You know all the words to the double-album set of the “Grease” soundtrack.

You know who shot J.R.

You know, by heart, the words to Weird Al Yankovic’s songs.

You learned to swim at about the same time “Jaws” came out… and still carry the emotional scars to prove it.

You owned a Jordache anything, or you remember when Jordache jeans were cool.

You recall when Love’s Baby Soft was in every girl’s Christmas stocking.

You remember “Friday Night Videos” before the days of MTV.

You remember Bo and Luke Duke, Daisy, Boss Hogg, or, worst of all – what Sheriff Roscoe’s full name was. (Coltrain)

You remember having a rotary phone.

You remember having to get off the couch to change the TV channel.

You remember that music that was labeled “alternative” really was.

You remember the days when “safe sex” meant “my parents are going out of town”.

You remember when film critics were certain that no movie could ever possibly get better special effects than those in the movie TRON.

You remember when there was only “G”, “PG”, and “R”.

You remember when your cable TV box had a sliding selector switch and your “cable or VCR remote” was connected to the TV by a CORD!

You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van and remember riding in the back of the station wagon trying to get passing trucks to honk at you.

You tuned in regularly to the adventures of the Bionic Man and Woman, Wonder Woman, and/or the Incredible Hulk.

You were not allowed to see The Exorcist, The Omen, or The Blue Lagoon when they came out.

You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on.

Your first musical purchase was an 8-track tape.

Your jaw would ache by the time you finished one of those brick-sized packages of Bazooka!

Your parents paid $2,000 for a top-loading VCR that was almost the size of a coffee table.

Your parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes anyway.

You’re currently employed doing something that has absolutely nothing to do with your college major.

You’re starting to believe that having the kids go to school all year wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all.

 

 

“Alternative” music actually was…and not popular Top 40 tunes.

“Ca-vey Wa-vey!” means anything to you.

“Celebration” by Kool & the Gang was one of the hot new songs when you first heard it at a school dance

“Poltergeist” totally freaked you out.

(Girls) You owned a pair of Pixie Boots, generally worn with leg warmers.

At one point during your teenage years, you walked with a noticeable tilt to one side due to the number of plastic rings on that arm.

Atari, IntelliVision, TelStar and Coleco were the ultimate gaming systems to own.

Cerise pink, electric blue and banana yellow have ever featured in your wardrobe or make-up collection.

Conveyor belts regularly carried washing machines, deep-fat fryers and a cuddly toy.

Dungeons & Dragons was your favorite cartoon.

Four-square was THE playground game.

Guys: You remember when a guy piercing his ear was radical to the max, but did it anyhow.

If you ever said “I pity the fool”.

In many of your childhood photos you are wearing something plaid.

Jelly bracelets & shoes!

Leg warmers and headbands alá Pat Benatar once looked really cool to you.

Never let them see you sweat.

Not that you’d do it personally, but body piercing captivates your attention

Once, while spending hours in the arcade, you actually lined up quarters on the top panel of the game — to “reserve” your spot.

One word: Izod.

Ooh, you could crush a Grape!

Parachuting Action man was your favorite toy.

Partying “like it’s 1999” seemed SO far away.

Pierce Brosnon will always be Remington Steele, not James Bond.

Poltergeist freaked you out.

Punks actually “shocked” people.

Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English language

Shiny grey flecked suits.

Spend a majority of your time in your late 20s & early 30s obsessing over how much better things were “back then”.

The Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories

The Dark Crystal is still one of your favorite movies.

The first time you ever kissed someone at a dance fell during “Crazy for You” by Madonna

The phrase “Where’s the beef?” still doubles you over with laughter

The TV movie “The Day After” still scares the heck out of you.

There were at least three people in your school that voluntarily went by the names of “Skip” “Buffy” “Muffy” or “Dexter.”

You thought eating Reese’s Pieces would attract your own Alien.

There were days that the homework just had to wait until the ABC Afterschool Special was over.

U2 is too “popular” and “mainstream” for you now

When someone mentions two consecutive days of the week, the Happy Days theme is stuck in your head for hours on end.

While in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate plans to get together again at the end of the century and play “1999” by Prince over and over again.

Words: “Atari” “IntelliVision” and “Coleco”. Sound familiar?

You actually believed for a minute that K.I.T.T. (The knight rider) actually was real.

You actually know who Rick Springfield is

You actually saw Ted Danson as the MacDaddy he played “Sam” to be.

You actually spent countless hours trying to perfect the care-bear stare.

You actually thought “Dirty Dancing” was a REALLY good movie.

You always wondered why Tootie always wore those skates.

You are still baffled by the “day glo” clothing trend.

You believed that “By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power!”

You can name at least half of the members of the elite “Brat Pack.”

You can remember Michael Jackson when he was black.

You can remember watching Full House and Saved by the Bell for endless hours.

You can remember what Quatro tasted like.

You can sing the McDonald’s Big Mack Filet-o-fish, quarter pounder, French Fry song while jump roping.

You can still sing the rap to “Fresh Prince of Belair”.

You can, right now, hum to yourself the theme to ‘Inspector Gadget’

You can’t remember a time when “going out for coffee” DIDN’T involve 49,000 selections to choose from.

You can’t remember a time when “hitting the outlet stores” didn’t mean going to an electrical warehouse

You can’t remember when the word “networking” didn’t have a computer connotation to it as well

You carried a big colored comb in your back pocket.

You carried you lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunchbox.

You chewed Dr. Pepper bubble gum.

You could break dance, or wish you could.

You could go through a case of Aqua Net hairspray in a week.

You could have got away with it if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids.

You cried at Zammo’s funeral.

You even wore fluorescent, neon if you will, clothing.

You ever did the top toggle of your coat up around your neck without having your arms in the sleeves, and knew you looked like a super-hero.

You ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran, Madonna, or Cyndi Lauper video.

You ever had a Swatch Watch, and a Swatch Guard for it.

You ever had more than 10 sweets in a 10p mix-up.

You fell victim to 80’s fashion: big hair, crimped, combed over to the side, and you wore spandex pants.

You freaked out a little when you realized you fall into the “26-50” category of most surveys.

You got a Little Professor calculator for Christmas.

You had a crush on Bo Derek.

You had a crush on Jon Bon Jovi, or know someone who did.

You had a crush on one of the Corey’s (Haim or Feldman).

You had a crush on one of the New Kids on the Block members.

You had a poster of Rob Lowe, Kirk Cameron, Michael J. Fox or Don Johnson on your wall.

You had to come in the house when the street lights came on.

You HAD to have your MTV.

You had to stay after class to scrub your desk because your silver Outliner pen leaked through.

You had top-of-the-line Commodore 64s in your jr. high computer lab

You had Wonder Woman or Superman underoos.

You have a tendency to turn the collar up on your Polo shirts.

You have ever called 867-5309.

You have ever danced (or even worse cried) to Kylie & Jason.

You have ever po-goed or space-hopped.

You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female Smurf.

You have heard of “Garbage Pail Kids” (and perhaps still have a collection of them).

You have seen at least 10 episodes of Fraggle Rock.

You have worn a Banana Clip, or knew someone who did.

You held the top score on Pac-Man.

You hid out behind the gym during recess to read “Are you there God, it’s me Margaret?” with your friends.

You hold a special place in your heart for “Back to the Future.”

You inserted the word “like” into, like, every sentence.

You jammed to the Miami Vice theme and thought Jan Hammer was cool.

You just had to have a Trapper Keeper to stay organized at school.

You knew “The Artist” when he was humbly called “Prince.”

You knew all the words to Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire”, but it really didn’t hold any meaning for you until about the third verse

You knew what Willis was “talkin’ ’bout.”

You knew who Max’s boss Jonathan Hart was.

You know all of the words to at least one of the Schoolhouse Rock songs.

You know all the words to “Ice Ice Baby”.

You know how (or wanted to be able) to Moonwalk!

You know how to use a rotary phone.

You know that another name for a keyboard is a “Synthesizer.”

You know the profound meaning of “Wax on, Wax off.”

You know what “Push Up” ice cream is.

You know what “sike” and “not!” mean

You know what a “burnout” is.

You know what a “Whammee” is..

You know what a Doozer is.

You know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair.

You know what movie the phrase, “Number 5 is alive!” is from.

You know where to go if you “wanna go where everybody knows your name.”

You know who Derek Wildstar, Mark Venture, Captain Avatar, Nova and Desslock are.

You know who Fat Albert is.

You know who He-Man and She-Ra are.

You know who Max Headroom is.

You know who Mr. T is.

You know who played Uncle Ned, Elyse’s brother, on Family Ties.

You know who Spuds McKenzie, The Noid, and Joe Isuzu are.

You know who Tina Yothers is.

You know, by heart, the words to any “Weird” Al Yankovic song.

You layered your multi-colored slouch socks, and added suspenders to make your outfit complete.

You like the guy who played Freddy Kruger better as Wilie on “V”.

You made Star Wars shrinky dinks in your oven.

You never questioned why the A-Team were always imprisoned in places that had sufficient tools to build an armored tank.

You remember the episode of Good Times when Flo broke down after James’ funeral.

you remember the first time “Space: Above and Beyond” aired it was called “Battlestar Galactica”

You remember the original version of Windows: Macintosh.

You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system

You remember when Betamax was at the cutting edge of technology.

You remember when cellular phones weighed 15 lbs. and had to be carried over your shoulder.

You remember when Deborah Gibson was “Debbie” Gibson.

You remember when Keith Chegwin & Maggie Philbin were the hottest romantic couple.

You remember when Madonna was just hitting the scene.

You remember when McDonald’s served their burgers in styrofoam boxes.

You remember when Molly Ringwald was on Facts of Life.

you remember when music that was labeled “alternative” really was

You remember when Ricky Martin was a member of Menudo.

You remember when Saturday Night Live was funny.

You remember when the A-Ha video was the pinnacle of modern technology, and you can still sing all the words.

You remember when you could buy half cans of soda (great for field trip days!).

You remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the streets and made your old big wheel quite obsolete.

You rolled the sleeves of your suit jacket up

You sat on your back porch, playing with your “My Little Pony” , “Rainbow Brite” , and “Strawberry Shortcake” dolls

You skipped school on the day Luke and Laura got married on General Hospital.

You stared a SLAM book or wrote in one.

You still know the Big Mac song. “Two all beef patties, special sauce…”

You still love to play Pong!

You think there should be a Kids Incorporated original cast reunion.

You thought “Weird Science” was a masterpiece.

You thought being a latch key kid was completely normal.

You thought Molly Ringwald was REALLY cool.

You’ve recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following phrases: – “When I was younger” – “When I was your age” – “You know, back when…” – “Because I SAID so, that’s why” – “What the HELL is this noise on the radio?” – “Just can’t (fill in the blank) like I used to”

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